apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
