Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Randomize
