I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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