Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize