im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
they're like a gay fantastic four
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
