So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
