In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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