I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
