I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
