Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
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