There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
