Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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