I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize