I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
meet me or not, i'm out of control
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
