It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Farmville is her only friend.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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