She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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