ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i already hear my dad disowning me
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
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