Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
