Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
