It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
The beer is more important than you right now.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
