shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
