Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
