I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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