Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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