Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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