THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
