he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
