His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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