And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
