Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
This baby is an asshole
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
