So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
