I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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