Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
