Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
