they need to just BURY HIM!
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
