Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
