in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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