K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
