Whod you bang
Its about making memories worth repressing
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
