Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize