finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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