it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
