Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Boobs are out for the taking
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
