Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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