You don't have asthma, your pregnant
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
we made out on top of his cat.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
