just tell him i said nine months
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
