So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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