He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize
