i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I could make wine with my vomit
Quick, to the slutcave!
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
