Pappa wants mamma naked
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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